I have a confession to make!!!!

Pg=100

I have a confession to make!

1. Happy Saint Patricks day
2. Happy birthday Lindsey
3. THIS IS MY CONFESSION:


I love irland. Saint Patricks day is one of my FAVORITE holidays. I love everything about irland:

- the land
- the culture
- the people
- the food
- the accents
- the music
- THE DANCEEEE


I would love to be a scotish/irish/celtic dancer.
I jsut got out of the theater from watching Micheal Flatley: LORD OF THE DANCE 3D

AMAZINGGGGGGGGG

I loved everything about it!!! i HIGHLY recomend gonig to see it.

I really wish i was irish.
Happy St. Patricks day,

Love (Forever & Always)
Hayley Michelle

Momma, i jsut jumped out of a window

(This is my History Essay for the Triangle Shirt-waiste factory thingy. I wrote alittle monolougue about it. so READ)

GIRL: All I could remember was burning. The smell of burning cloth, wood, and flesh. All I could hear were screams and cries. Ones that came from the bellies of young ones. Ones that knew that the reaper of life was beyond the fiery wall that had faced them. Many became animalistic: Pushing and shoving their friends and their family out of the way just to save their own petty little lives. Many were immigrates. Many did not speak English, and for those there was no chance of survival. There was a girl by me, barley even 17. I remember working beside her in the mornings, and her pretty face turned ugly with fear. She knew that there would be no hope for her. I swore she could fly. Her mother held her hand, trying to fight her struggling, but she knew it was in vain. I remember hearing her say “Momma, I just jumped out of a window” and then I heard a scream. I knew that this angel of hope had no wings to fly. And yet, she did. But some flights we do not recover from. I saw the elevators packed like sardines in a can. Some clinging onto the railings, trying to climb there way out. I saw others lying at the bottom, waiting to be crushed by their only ride to freedom. The green stairs, were burned to a crisp black and were no good for us all. The 9^th floor was the deepest circle in hell. Burning with flames of intoxicating death. If the fire would not kill us, surely our lungs would collapse. I heard cracking outside of the building, and looked down to see many falling to their doom. The only escape from our hell had broken to pieces. Surely there had to be another way. Many were frantic. Many were praying, but prayers cannot be answer in hell. No, no one can hear you in hell. Soon, those will be gone. The prayers will be gone, for they shall be spoken no more. Soon the burning will stop, for there will be nothing more for the fire to burn. Soon I shall be gone too, for there is no hope for me. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. And when I am gone, the fire will consume my body, and perhaps in this hell whole I may find some heaven in the land that no traveler returns from. Oh take me Reaper of life, cut me with your blade, and send my soul to the place I am destined for. Leave my body on this earth to perish with the others, but spear my soul, for it is just and good. Spear the young ones and their mothers, for an end should not be like this. And take me far away from flame, for my end shall not be like this. I am on the ledge of the inferno palace. I am an angel of hope, and I shall too spread my wings over this fiery land.

“Momma, I just jumped out of a window”.

200th BLOG!!!!!!

PG=100

THIS IS MY 200th BLOG EVERYONE!!!!!
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

So to celbrate, lets start off with some MORE ANGST AND ANGER.

no, actually...last night after Rehersal for Coedy of errors, after everyone left...i cried until my parents came and picked me up.

i am seriously begining to hate the other freshmen. I was so prepaired to go home and write the MEANEST BLOGE VER jsut flipping everyone off...and then i relized that they weren't worth my time.

Its jsut that, i relized yesturday that they're never gonna like me....Adjenea told me.

She litrally said " You know Hayley, i only stood up for you today because your in theater"
but she's giving herself a dab to much credit.
She didn't stand up for me. SHE DIDN"T DO SHIT.
and its not jsut her...its alot of others that will go un-mentioned. im not THAT low....

But i dont care. Its just, it was the first time anyone adressed the situation. Everyone makes fun of me. I'm used to it, so i jsut brush it off my shoulders and keep on moving... but its the first time anyone's really offically said it. outloud, i mean and to my face.
I know they talk about me behind my back.

And then i went home to my parents, and they basically told me to change myself and be like them.
HELLLLL NOOOO.

I think they should all jsut be like me.
But whatever, love me hate me, say what you want about me, but just to remind you:
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but GUNS AND ROSES BEAT YOU ALL.
hahahahahaha.

So in retaliation to everyone's hatred twards me..i wrote a "song". Its jsut lyrics right now, but its gonna get music soon:

________________________________________________________________________________


V: You march to the beat of the drum/ and i dont even know what the hell i march to/ but what i really want to know is/ who died and left the thrown to you?/ Last time i checked/ i didn't make you incharge/ of telling me what to wear/ Your not the advisor of my world/ and frankly, i dont really care/
I may be an aquired taste/ but one thing's for sure i'm not a waste/ and your jsut wasting my time:

C: Love me/ hate me/ i know that you want me/ your just jelous/ because your not this fabulous/ sticks and stones/ my break my bones/ but rock and roll/ will never get old./ and your juat cold/ from the ice cube that froze your soul/

V: i know what you say about me/ dont think that i can't hear/ but atleast im not that low a level/ your just hating cuz you hate to hide your fear/ of what you say/ what you do/ who made you the queen/ Because if you haven't noticed./ not everything/ is about you honey/ its all about me/
and all the attention your giving me/ its got me fealing special and shiney/

C: Love me/ hate me/ i know that you want me/ your just jelous/ because your not this fabulous/ sticks and stones/ my break my bones/ but rock and roll/ will never get old./ and your juat cold/ from the ice cube that froze your soul/

B: Sticks and stones/ and words that hurt/ and/ rubber band sling shots/ those are the worst/ but your jsut low/ like the tempature of your soul/ so hate on me/ because i'll give what i recive/ and you can talk all you want/ but who ever told you that your opinion matter's/ cuz it dont/

C: Love me/ hate me/ i know that you want me/ your just jelous/ because your not this fabulous/ sticks and stones/ my break my bones/ but rock and roll/ will never get old./ and your juat cold/ from the ice cube that froze your soul/

__________________________________________________________________________________

So ya. thats it. Comment if you have anything to say, because you can only dish it if you can take it. And i've been taking it for TOO long...so ya. i jsut dont even care anymore. i jsut feel really lonely sometimes...all alone.

I know i always talk shiz about my friends, but i have one good friend. Her name is Faith Freedman, and i love her. Seriously, i want to adopt her as my sister. i love her THAT much.

She's the only one that really gets me...and she is seriously thinknig about auditioning to the program.
And i'm jsut really sick and tired of being all alone.
I miss her. Havn't seen her in a while.
She's never been to disney before, so for spring break i'm surprising her and taking her there.

<3

she really is my only friend.
So ya, i am still mega pissed...but i know its gonna get better. because certian freshmena re leaving, others will get into drugs and disapear from my life, and some people may join me and relize how stupid and superficial we're all being.

I canonly hope for the best,
Hayley Michelle

must....orginize...(OCD TIME!!!)

PG=1000

ok, so today was my first day back from suspension.
i was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO glad to be back.
I missed shop!

So today we teched, and i had funnn. Got to fold fabric anddraw with soap so i am a very happy girl.
BUT THEN WHEN I WENT TO GET THE SAFTEY PINS AND I OPENED THE DRAW AND IT WAS A MESS.

I had recently orginized it: hat pins, saftey pins, other sharp objects i found, and a nice neat stack papers.

THE PAPERS WERE EVERY WHERE, SO WERE THE HAT PINS AND THE SAFTEY PINS WERE GONE!!!!

PEOPLE
WILL
PAY

I dont have OCD, but in a way i do.
Last year i took an entire week and orginized our drama club's costume shop by color, fabric, size and season.

Single handedly. I jsut find it that when you orginize with outher people, it never gets orginizied. if you want something done, you do it yourself.

I know that for main stage, costume shop is Lea's baby, so i know it wasnt her who screwed up my orginization (its her baby. if someone messed it up tshe would b mad to) (hi lea), AND WHO EVER DID SCREW MY ORGINAZTION...IF YOU CONFESS NOW NOW BODILY HARM WILL COME TO YOU.

After main stage, i will make it my life to fix the costume shop IF ITS THE
LAST
THING
I
DO.

Cages for Animals: Freedom for Sale

New play.
yay.
i have lately had a VERYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY terrible experiance..as you all know.
And i have been having alot of writing block lately, so i am writing this just to finish things.

I have recently discovered thati tend to NEVER FINIHS WHAT I START.
so that is what i am doin,
FINISH
WHAT
I START.

Will be done by Friday, the latest.

Wont turn it in until after mainstage.
GO FIRE AND INSAINTY!!!!

Hayley Michelle

Ricky Jay Trapped In An Elevator With Two Stupid Girls

WORST. DAY. EVER

PG=100

ok. yesturday was the worst day ever. i got into a "fight" and later got suspended. The other girl did not. I was crying my eyes out all day. i lost my wallet and then missed my bus, so i had to stay after school for theater. I was going to go to free pancake day with Miguel..so I WALKED ALL THE WAY THERE IN HIGH HEELS JUST TO RELIZE THAT THE LINE WAS TOO LONG AND I DIDNT GET ANY PANCAKES!!!

So with blisters on my beautiful feet, i went back to the mall with miguel, and almost fell into  a trash can. (never sit on a trash can) walked back, and cleaned out paint cans for half the rehersal.
Wait...you think, "how could this possibly get any worse?" well guess what.

IT GETS WORSE.

So i was stuck in the janator's closet, and i acidently droped the paint can in the sink and it splattered alll over my clothes. my NEW CLOTHES.
So i start screaming at myself in the mirror of the Janitor's closet. absolute ramapage of chaos.
FOR HOURS. ( i actually dont know how long, but it was more than 45 minutes , i can tell you that).

And people were passing me by and one guy came in and asked if i was ok.
And after telling him my life story, he left.
And then i fell in the sink and hit my head.
All the boxes fell over and everything was messy.

So i fixed everything up, and then i cried.
alot.

after that, i saw Ms.Aladren's ADORABLE babies.
And you would think that babies would make everything feel better, but it made me feel really bad because my skin isnt as pretty or as soft  as a baby's.
And then i thoguht, "holy crap, im jelous of a baby. i need theropy. right. now"
so then i went to do light inventory with Miguel, Adjenea, Abbi and Michelle.

And i droped an ilipsoidelle on my foot.
ITS OK! nothing is broken, and the light was perfectly fine.
the only think broken is my dignity.

And then i got the call that i was suspended and then i cried even more.
i thought about litterally not coming home.

But then i decided not too because that would make my parents even more mad.
So when i went home, my parents said that the police might get involved and now i feel like a dilinquet.
Its not like i KILLED her....

I really hope nothing happens.
Im a good person.
good things happened to GOOD people, bad things happen to BAD people.
That's the way the world should work, but of course..it doesnt.
grrrr.

WORST
DAY
EVER


and this mourning i ger a call from mr.brown telling me that i cant go to my MANDITORY SET DESIGHN MEETING TODAY AND I WAS SO PISSED I BROKE MY MINI-VIOLIN.

After i glued it back together, i cried some more.

I know it seems like i'm over re-acting, but to me this is everyday and very serious.
If camaera's fallowed me around, my life would be like an episode of Degrassi but with better acting and less pretty people.

Also, degrassi is filmed in canada.

So lets all pray that today will be better.

Hayley Michelle